Lady Julia’s Entranced Realm

Over the years I’ve heard a large number of women share stories about faking orgasms, but the subject of men and faux orgasms is one that is seldom mentioned. Many of the ladies I know think men simply don’t fake it, but I don’t believe that to be the case. Recently I read survey results indicating as many as 25 percent of men have misled their partners regarding this issue. I wonder at the accuracy of that number but even more than that, I wonder about the age range of men who said “yes” and the “whys” behind it all.

Because I’m ever curious, I thought I would see what all of you had to say on this subject. I’ve created a completely anonymous survey that will only take a few minutes to complete. And.. bonus.. it will please me so much to find that you were willing to respond ;)

The survey can be found here.

If you were to pick one part of the human body as the one you found the sexiest, which would it be?

“While 75 percent of men always reach orgasm during sex, only 29 percent of women report the same. In addition, most women are unable to climax through vaginal intercourse, instead needing clitoral stimulation.” – National Health and Social Life Survey

Thank heavens I’m a Domme.

If you’ve stopped by my blog very often, you will have noticed that I post a large number of photos of traditionally gorgeous people.   While it’s true that those photos are pleasant to view, I don’t want it to appear that I think the “perfect” bodies and faces are the only ones I consider sexy.  In truth, they aren’t even the ones I consider “most” attractive.

Earlier in the week, I spent some time watching the movie “A Knight’s Tale”, a perfectly delightful film starring, among others, Mark Addy (pictured above).  You may notice that I lumped Heath Ledger into the “among others” category and singled out Mr. Addy.  While Heath was certainly a very handsome young man, I found Mark to be much more attactive.

Yes, he’s a bit overweight.  Yes, he’s losing a bit of his hair and he’s older.  And yes, he has gorgeous eyes, a great smile, and that lovely beard.  Yum.  I can easily imagine someone like him serving me  while wearing only a chef’s apron or perhaps kneeling naked and eager to please.  Definitely a flush producing thought ;)

Even better than his general physical attractiveness was his character’s personality.  He was loyal, tender, and funny – all qualities that I consider very sexy.

We’re accustomed to many women in our society having issues with their self-image because they’re not 25, not pencil thin, do not possess a gorgeous face, etc.  I’ve noticed lately that many of the men I know – really sexy men – are dealing with the same issues.  They cannot see how sexy they really are and I find that so sad.

I definitely do not fit into the “perfect” size and face category.  I’m 47, not 25.  I’m a bit chubby, not pencil thin.  I have an average face, not a gorgeous one.  For a number of years it was work to feel confident about myself because I didn’t meet the Hollywood norm for sexual attractiveness.  Eventually I found that there were men who had a broader definition of the drool-worthy woman than the one presented by the entertainment industry.  Thanks to them, I learned to relax and like myself more.  It’s decidedly easier to feel sexy and be sexy when you’re relaxed and like yourself a little ;)

So.. I’m writing this to all those who might be reading and who consider themselves less than attractive.  I can’t speak for anyone other than myself, but I find bald or balding men sexy.  I think big guys are sexy.   I love older men.  That doesn’t mean I don’t find someone with nice hair and great abs attractive ;)  I’m just saying there’s lots more to sexy than the stereotypes and I’m absolutely certain I’m not alone in this belief.

I realize this is hardly a startling revelation, but I think until more people accept it, it bears repeating.  I believe when we learn to be confident (not arrogant) and see ourselves as sexy – others will too.  Odds are there are already others who see us that way but they’re difficult to find if we lack the confidence to look.

Three posts in one day.  Seems I have a bit on my mind :)

I was talking with a friend earlier about my previous post, “The Internet or Sex – Which Will It Be?“.  When I remarked that I really had difficulty believing that 39 percent of males ages 18-34 would choose the internet over sex, he reminded me how strongly many people’s sexual lives were impacted by the internet.  Clearly the things available online can be a driving force in masturbation fantasies.

After thinking a bit, I wondered how many people felt masturbation was just as good or better than sex.  As a general rule, do you?  (Yes, of course there are exceptions and many factors to take in consideration.  I’m just curious which you’d choose over the other if you had to choose.)

“At this point, dear reader, let me concede one shocking truth. Some young women actually anticipate the wedding night ordeal with curiosity and pleasure! Beware such an attitude! One cardinal rule of marriage should never be forgotten: give little, give seldom, and above all give grudgingly.” –RUTH SMYTHERS, Instruction and Advice for the Young Bride (1894)