It’s been a busy week so I haven’t had time to post or respond to emails nearly as much as I wanted. Surely time must be a woman, because if it were a man I think I could persuade him to be a little more relaxed with his rules. Thirty hours in a day? Oh my, yes! Such a good boy.. that’s precisely what I need. Could you arrange with the Sandman to be a bit more frugal with his magical dust so I can sleep less and feel better than I do now? Thank you! I am so very pleased :)
Ah well, back to the real world.
At the moment I’m sitting in a warm car waiting for Richard to pick up a few things in the pharmacy. Since we had 6 inches of snow on the ground when we awakened and much deeper drifts along the driveway, etc., we pretty much stayed indoors yesterday. When he mentioned getting out, I didn’t even wait to see where he was going – what did it matter? It was the great outdoors! Ok, the great parking lot.
It’s interesting to sit and watch people when they don’t know anyone is paying attention. A 50-something man just let the door slam in the face of an elderly woman, leaving a visibly indignant 20ish man to assist her. People say today’s young people have no manners (something that people have been saying for decades or longer I am sure), but that certainly doesn’t always seem to be the case.
Speaking of misperceptions about people…
I’ve been thinking about discrimination a lot this week. Someone I spoke with recently said he didn’t believe women were really treated differently than men in the work place. Just wondering.. do you find that to be the case? I admit, I have worked doing private duty nursing care for the past several years, but I can’t imagine things have changed that much in such a short time. More on that in another post, but I do hope you’ll share your insight in the meantime.
On a related note, do you find the people around you frequently gender bash? Perhaps it would be interesting to take note this week to determine just how often we are exposed to gender bias and even hatred. If you are frequently exposed, do you believe it has an impact on you?
More soon.
~ Lady Julia
No related posts.
umbrella opens
lips burn red and passion fades
climax remembers
It’s real common for women to hate on men. My wife’s friends are always talking about what assholes their husbands are. The women at work talk about how worthless men are. My sister hates men. Really hates them.
I don’t think women are discriminated against any more. If anything it is the opposite. Men can’t say nothing to women at work without being accused of sexual harassment. I stay away from them.
“I’ve been thinking about discrimination a lot this week. Someone I spoke with recently said he didn’t believe women were really treated differently than men in the work place. Just wondering.. do you find that to be the case? [...] I do hope you’ll share your insight in the meantime.”
Are women really treated differently to men in the workplace? In my experience as a woman who has been frequently disadvantaged by gender-based double standards, absolutely.
Regarding the man you spoke with recently, it is also my experience that those who are advantaged by double standards are far less likely to notice them than those who are disadvantaged.
“On a related note, do you find the people around you frequently gender bash? [...] If you are frequently exposed, do you believe it has an impact on you?”
Do I find the people around me frequently gender bash? Absolutely, and lots of other bashing as well. Do I believe it has an impact on me? Absolutely.
I feel a lot of unhappiness and sometimes despair when I observe bigotry of any kind, especially if the ones doing it are unaware of what they are doing, and more especially if the ones doing it don’t care when this is pointed out to them. This is partly because it reminds me of my own experiences of being on the receiving end (which have always been very unpleasant), and partly because I know that this is an indication that the human suffering resulting from such behaviour is more than likely to continue indefinitely.
I have also observed that the targets of one kind of discrimination or bashing are sometimes prone to repeat this behaviour against others, and the unhappy, unpleasant cycle continues. I think that’s an impact most of us are likely to have experienced to some degree. I feel very depressed about that.
Many people have donated to help the people in Haiti, which I think is great because many people like to help reduce human suffering. What depresses me is that so many people are so very willing to help strangers far away, yet many of the same people frequently disregard those in need who are close to home.
I think that no matter who does it and to whom, disrespectful, discriminatory double standards adversely impact us all. I also think that no matter who does it and for whom, respectful, warm and helpful behaviour benefits us all.
Lady Julia,
I find women and men treated very differently in the work place. I am an engineer. I would say that less than 10% of the engineers I work with are women.
This leads to interesting behavior. Needless to say attractive women engineers get a lot of “attention”. Most resent it. Some exploit it.
Universities and business that are subject to quotas spend a lot of time and money recruiting women. Women engineers average 2 to 5% more coming out of school compared to their male counterparts. But I noticed there is a definite glass ceiling for women. They usually rise to middle management and then languish there. That is when the good old boy network kicks in.
One of the best bosses I had was a woman. We nicknamed her mom, because she was always looking out for us. She could be strict or tough if she had to be. But she preferred to encourage us. She scared to the good old boys to death. So they kept giving her one loser group after another so she would fail. But she had the audacity to turn each group around. Every loser group she lead turned into top performers. Unfortunately she got a rare virus and had to go onto extended leave. The good old boys took all her good clients away that she had carefully built up. When she came back she got demoted because she didn’t meet revenue goals. She eventually went to another company, where she did very well. I see that type of behavior a lot.
Mike
My field is certainly male-dominated. There is a perception in the field that the women in the field are not as good as the men are. Because it’s male-dominated, it’s far easier to think of lots of men who are superb but very few women. I suspect this is the cause of the perception. But the results: upon meeting a woman in my field, most guys will assume she’s not that good. So she has an uphill battle to prove herself.
I’m not sure that’s 100% bad. Because it’s also a field that respects quality work. That is, she *can* prove herself which is quite different than if the men were closed-minded about it. And actually, I wonder if the way the women are treated isn’t how the men should be treated, too. “Prove yourself,” isn’t a bad thing to hear at all.
If we look at the proportion of females in roles of influence and leadership then the conclusion must be drawn that discrimination is still going strong.
That individuals suffer is bad enough. But what amazes me is the “effectiveness” of the collective cultural and social forces in play that “favour” the male in positions of power. It has been going on for a lot of years!. It amazes me but even more it depresses me.
I am totally convinced that if whatever is causing the unbalance were rectified:
1. We would not have had the global financial crisis we have/are having
2. Religions would not have caused as much suffering as they have
3. Wars and killing people would not be an option to find a solution to a disagreement
4. People would not be dying of hunger
5. The environment would not be three quarters screwed